Friday, December 13, 2019
My three-year dying plan may not make it that long. Wednesday was a great day. I presented at a businesswomen’s networking group I belong to, and I think I did a pretty good job. When I returned home, my upper body was covered in sweat. I had my significant other, Donald, help me take off my soaked suit jacket so I could warm up.
Excess sweating has been my number one symptom for my cancer. Aversion to food was my number two symptom. I still do not like many of my favorite foods anymore, but I do not hate everything. My excess sweating completely stopped this past summer, which is why it was so easy to believe my cancer was gone. The return of the sweating began in September and has been mostly manageable. I do not notice the sweating at home because I have a space heater blowing directly on me, drying the sweat off.
I have been able to leave the house and my shirt will get a little wet and I will be cold when I return, but I recover fairly quickly once I am home with a heater blowing on me. Until Wednesday. Half an hour after Donald took off my suit jacket and I started blowing a heater on me, my teeth were still chattering. I asked Donald to lay me down in my bed because I sweat less lying down than sitting in my chair. I also have a heater on both sides of my bed, so I can get double the heat.
I figured I was just having a bad day because I had been gone so long, until yesterday. Yesterday morning I felt sweaty sitting in front of my heater brushing my teeth. I had my monthly wound care appointment and left at 8:30 a.m. When I got home at 12:45 p.m., my shirt was wet down to my waistline. My helper is usually here on Thursdays, and she helped me remove my shirt so I could sit in my bra and dry off. We brought one of the heaters from my bedroom to place on the other side of my computer so I would not need to go to bed to warm up. It still took more than two hours before I felt warm enough.
This morning I felt sweaty while I was still lying in my bed. When I got to my chemotherapy treatment the top third of my shirt was wet. I was looking forward to my steroids. I got home about 12:15 p.m. with a still wet shirt and the steroids started kicking in. My shirt was dry (thanks to the heater) by the time I left to pick up my seven-year-old, Mika, from school for a doctor’s appointment at 1:00 p.m. The steroids stopped the sweat and I was able to get Mika to and from her appointment without any more sweat. I was simply chilly, not cold when we arrived back home.
Three super sweaty days in a row worries me. Am I going to die soon? I am not ready. I have accomplished very little of my exceptional exit plan. I am going to be really annoyed if that awesome farewell message I delivered Wednesday was the beginning of my end. I am concerned my new chemotherapy treatment is not affecting my cancer and we will need to switch to another one Dr. Doom and Gloom did not want to use on me because of a specific side effect that could cause more skin wounds.
I am going to need to step up my efforts to complete the tasks on my exceptional exit plan task list. Next week I should be able to finally start recording videos for my family. I am not sure what I will say once the camera starts rolling. A few of them will be easy, but I do not have a clue what I will be saying for Mika’s birthday videos. What will a nine-year-old Mika need to hear? What will a nineteen-year-old Mika need to hear?
My piece of advice to you is to simply get started. I am sure the fact that I am leaving video messages will be more important to my family than my actual words.
Until next time,
Susanne
Please check out my GoFundMe page.
My three-year dying plan may not make it that long. Wednesday was a great day. I presented at a businesswomen’s networking group I belong to, and I think I did a pretty good job. When I returned home, my upper body was covered in sweat. I had my significant other, Donald, help me take off my soaked suit jacket so I could warm up.
Excess sweating has been my number one symptom for my cancer. Aversion to food was my number two symptom. I still do not like many of my favorite foods anymore, but I do not hate everything. My excess sweating completely stopped this past summer, which is why it was so easy to believe my cancer was gone. The return of the sweating began in September and has been mostly manageable. I do not notice the sweating at home because I have a space heater blowing directly on me, drying the sweat off.
I have been able to leave the house and my shirt will get a little wet and I will be cold when I return, but I recover fairly quickly once I am home with a heater blowing on me. Until Wednesday. Half an hour after Donald took off my suit jacket and I started blowing a heater on me, my teeth were still chattering. I asked Donald to lay me down in my bed because I sweat less lying down than sitting in my chair. I also have a heater on both sides of my bed, so I can get double the heat.
I figured I was just having a bad day because I had been gone so long, until yesterday. Yesterday morning I felt sweaty sitting in front of my heater brushing my teeth. I had my monthly wound care appointment and left at 8:30 a.m. When I got home at 12:45 p.m., my shirt was wet down to my waistline. My helper is usually here on Thursdays, and she helped me remove my shirt so I could sit in my bra and dry off. We brought one of the heaters from my bedroom to place on the other side of my computer so I would not need to go to bed to warm up. It still took more than two hours before I felt warm enough.
This morning I felt sweaty while I was still lying in my bed. When I got to my chemotherapy treatment the top third of my shirt was wet. I was looking forward to my steroids. I got home about 12:15 p.m. with a still wet shirt and the steroids started kicking in. My shirt was dry (thanks to the heater) by the time I left to pick up my seven-year-old, Mika, from school for a doctor’s appointment at 1:00 p.m. The steroids stopped the sweat and I was able to get Mika to and from her appointment without any more sweat. I was simply chilly, not cold when we arrived back home.
Three super sweaty days in a row worries me. Am I going to die soon? I am not ready. I have accomplished very little of my exceptional exit plan. I am going to be really annoyed if that awesome farewell message I delivered Wednesday was the beginning of my end. I am concerned my new chemotherapy treatment is not affecting my cancer and we will need to switch to another one Dr. Doom and Gloom did not want to use on me because of a specific side effect that could cause more skin wounds.
I am going to need to step up my efforts to complete the tasks on my exceptional exit plan task list. Next week I should be able to finally start recording videos for my family. I am not sure what I will say once the camera starts rolling. A few of them will be easy, but I do not have a clue what I will be saying for Mika’s birthday videos. What will a nine-year-old Mika need to hear? What will a nineteen-year-old Mika need to hear?
My piece of advice to you is to simply get started. I am sure the fact that I am leaving video messages will be more important to my family than my actual words.
Until next time,
Susanne
Please check out my GoFundMe page.