Tuesday, November 12, 2019
The video gods are conspiring against me. I am finally mentally ready to start recording my video messages, but real life keeps interfering. First, I had trouble with my webcam picking up my audio. I solved the webcam issue by deciding to use my video camera on a small tripod and today was the day I was to start recording videos, again. It is not happening.
I have a chest cold and keep having coughing fits when I try to talk. My voice is nearly nonexistent, and I am tired because my coughing is keeping me awake at night. My number one exceptional exit plan task is still not started. I am five weeks in, and I do not have a single video message recorded. I am still writing every day, which is also part of my number one task, but I know the video messages will probably offer more comfort when I am gone than my daily, written thoughts.
I do not think my demise is imminent. Dr. Doom and Gloom did not give me an estimation and he said some patients have lived a few years on the treatment I am using. I am planning to live at least three years, so I have plenty of time to record my video messages. Except real life tends to get in the way. This chest cold could turn into pneumonia (which I have had several times) and this time it could kill me because I am compromised from the chemotherapy drug. I would die without any video messages recorded.
Next week, I do not think I have any days to record and the week after that is a school break so then it will be seven weeks and not a single video message recorded. Video recording has been moved to the first week of December. The video gods are conspiring against me.
Every part of my exceptional exit plan is taking longer than I want it to. I am still packing up all my 24-year-old’s, Megan, stuff for her to move to her new home. Megan has taken exactly one of the ten or so boxes I have had packed for her to transport to her house. I am close to finishing her bedroom and then it will officially become my seven-year-old’s, Mika, bedroom.
Mika is so excited about her new bedroom. I cleared off two, skinny-tower bookcases on Monday so Mika may start moving her books into the bedroom this weekend. Once I take Mika down to buy regular hangers to replace the children’s hangers she currently uses, we will start putting her clothes in the bedroom closet instead of the metal rack downstairs or on a chair in my lower level great room.
Mika has been granted the upstairs bathroom, because that was the first room I de-Meganed, and she has been working to keep it clean. I do still need to have Megan go through the small linen closet in the bathroom to take out any items she wants. It is really nice to have a bathroom with a clean countertop again. I never use that bathroom because I do not fit in the door, so I suppose I will need to have someone tell me what to put in it for guests to use.
My piece of advice to you is to not sweat the schedule. I could be freaking out (I am a little) that I have not recorded any video messages, or I can appreciate the fact that I can make more content notes before I start recording. I could keep looking at all that is left to do before my house is officially de-Meganed, or I can be happy that Mika has her own (shared with guests) bathroom and Megan is starting to get her new house in order. I get to choose how I interpret my surroundings and I see the silver, gold, and platinum linings.
Until next time,
Susanne
Please check out my GoFundMe page.
The video gods are conspiring against me. I am finally mentally ready to start recording my video messages, but real life keeps interfering. First, I had trouble with my webcam picking up my audio. I solved the webcam issue by deciding to use my video camera on a small tripod and today was the day I was to start recording videos, again. It is not happening.
I have a chest cold and keep having coughing fits when I try to talk. My voice is nearly nonexistent, and I am tired because my coughing is keeping me awake at night. My number one exceptional exit plan task is still not started. I am five weeks in, and I do not have a single video message recorded. I am still writing every day, which is also part of my number one task, but I know the video messages will probably offer more comfort when I am gone than my daily, written thoughts.
I do not think my demise is imminent. Dr. Doom and Gloom did not give me an estimation and he said some patients have lived a few years on the treatment I am using. I am planning to live at least three years, so I have plenty of time to record my video messages. Except real life tends to get in the way. This chest cold could turn into pneumonia (which I have had several times) and this time it could kill me because I am compromised from the chemotherapy drug. I would die without any video messages recorded.
Next week, I do not think I have any days to record and the week after that is a school break so then it will be seven weeks and not a single video message recorded. Video recording has been moved to the first week of December. The video gods are conspiring against me.
Every part of my exceptional exit plan is taking longer than I want it to. I am still packing up all my 24-year-old’s, Megan, stuff for her to move to her new home. Megan has taken exactly one of the ten or so boxes I have had packed for her to transport to her house. I am close to finishing her bedroom and then it will officially become my seven-year-old’s, Mika, bedroom.
Mika is so excited about her new bedroom. I cleared off two, skinny-tower bookcases on Monday so Mika may start moving her books into the bedroom this weekend. Once I take Mika down to buy regular hangers to replace the children’s hangers she currently uses, we will start putting her clothes in the bedroom closet instead of the metal rack downstairs or on a chair in my lower level great room.
Mika has been granted the upstairs bathroom, because that was the first room I de-Meganed, and she has been working to keep it clean. I do still need to have Megan go through the small linen closet in the bathroom to take out any items she wants. It is really nice to have a bathroom with a clean countertop again. I never use that bathroom because I do not fit in the door, so I suppose I will need to have someone tell me what to put in it for guests to use.
My piece of advice to you is to not sweat the schedule. I could be freaking out (I am a little) that I have not recorded any video messages, or I can appreciate the fact that I can make more content notes before I start recording. I could keep looking at all that is left to do before my house is officially de-Meganed, or I can be happy that Mika has her own (shared with guests) bathroom and Megan is starting to get her new house in order. I get to choose how I interpret my surroundings and I see the silver, gold, and platinum linings.
Until next time,
Susanne
Please check out my GoFundMe page.